Just Say ‘No’ to Snow

Due to the planet over-heating like a camel’s ass in Dubai, snow is melting so well every year, that scientist think pretty soon there will be no more snow anywhere on Earth. And that’s good news for summer sports! Could you imagine skateboarding…

from TheSpoof.com : Spoof News : Science & Technology https://ift.tt/OJHFxSg

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Chinese Junk Falling Down

What the fuck are the Chinese doing up there? They’re on the dark side of the moon. They’re building their own space station (something America has done with Skylab, but that didn’t last long). Do they have solar-powered skateboards on Mars? (…

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The South Pole Is Experiencing a Never-Before Heat Wave - 725 Tons of Ice Have Turned To Water

SOMEWHERE IN THE SOUTH POLE - (Satire News) - A team of Icelandic scientists traveled to the South Pole to study the effects of global warming. The team of five members were led by Lars Bushinquick, who is the world's foremost expert on anything t…

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Jet Planes Cause Global Warming - Back to Boats Like Titanic

According to experts there are about 40 million airplane flights, worldwide every year. That's a lot of pollution - (21 pounds of CO2 produced per gallon of fuel). We might have to switch back to beautiful cruise ships to travel. Wouldn't th…

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Frack is Whack

Is your water on fire? What? NO! Why not? Here, at Halliburton, we can show you how to drill and turn water into fire. Fire is what helped Mankind evolve, so fire good, yes? The company once employed Dick “the Slick Trick” Cheney and is now re…

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American Fat Asses Can Save The World

A recent study by top Geneva body-weight index scientists have found an exciting new co-relation between fat and fuel. One can solve the other! Which country has the most overweight people in the world? It’s not America, but American Samoa. Cou…

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Dr. Futuro Gives Latest Theory on Why People are Obese - It's in the Jeans

Dr. Futuro is a Futurologist and head of Obesity research in London. According to his latest theory, about 5 million years ago, our Pre - Pre - Pre (100, 000 'Pre - ') Ancestors were on the beach in Ethiopia. They weren't quite human yet but were…

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Coronavirus Surge 3,523 - Omicron B5-A #533 is now Hot In America Says Epidemiologist

Dr. Strangeheart of the Chromosome Institute says there is a hot new variant of the Coronavirus, Omicron BA - 5, Sub - Sub - Sub - Variant - just in from Hong Kong via Mao Airlines. They are calling it the Trumphead Virus as the Spikes stick out…

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Space Jesus Got Crucified … Again.

NASA has reported finding a solar system much like our own. They were able to zoom in on an Earth-like planet to find that the ‘people’ there had advanced to a time period approximately the same as Earth’s Roman Empire. And they saw an alien Jesus…

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Space Force! Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You!

I still can’t figure out what America’s newest military branch, Space Force, does. It sounds like something from Hollywood, and was invented by someone who used to be a TV star. Is there a war in space about to happen? Will Space Force “Guardians…

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Scientists Find Out Sex is Evolutionarily Designed For Pleasure - Not Procreation

All mammals on Earth that have sex and get sexual pleasure from it - from giant elephant and whale orgasms to tiny mouse-squeak ones Using statistics, scientists have broken the information on orgasms down into easy increments for us lesser beings…

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A Canadian Yukon Express Snowstorm May Dump As Much As 21 Inches of Snow In Laredo, Texas

CHICAGO - (Satire News) - The Illinois Dept. of Weather has just announced that a powerful snowstorm named The Canadian Yukon Express, is heading toward the US. A rep for the IDW, noted that the huge, blistering cold snowstorm will be going as far…

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South Korean Teens Control the Twitterverse

Dear teenagers of South Korea … you win. No matter what is happening in the world, no matter the wars or riots, the evil fascists who are currently changing laws to punish people for being people, removing freedoms, turning the average person into…

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Elon Musk Says His Space Hotel Is Already Fully Booked

NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - According to Press Extra writer Voodoo Dupree, One of the richest men in the world has now also become one of the world's biggest jerks. Musk, is acting like an immature, crybaby, simply because President Biden, has…

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The Huge Meteor That Was Heading For Duck Dung, Alabama Is Now Going To Land In Dodge City, Kansas

CHICAGO – (Satire News) – Weather experts are now stating that the gigantic meteor which was scheduled to hit Alabama in March will not hit the cotton-pickin’ state after all. Weather expert, and collector of foreign adult toys, Toby Prixsteen, ha…

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